Bible Park USA

What about a "Two of Every Kind" zoo? That'd blow people away.

Coaster Junkie from NH
I drive in & out of Boston, so I ride coasters to relax!

Don't forget President Bush's "search for weapons of mass destruction ball crawl and/or maze."

And the "Choirboy: Escape from Father O'Reily" launch coaster.

And how about the best ride "All Y'all are goin' Straight To Hell?"
boblogone's avatar
In a handbasket?
speaking as an athiest, anywhere that has some good rides i night come across in my travels, i'll go check it out. however, i just have this mental image of something i sawon the history channel of a haunted house in a church with the idea of scaring the **** out of, and controlling the kid's minds with scenes each leading to hell, like gay people, chics getting abortions, etc. hopefully they stay away from that kind of stuff. and yeah, if they have a slow gas leak near the statues where people can pray and send them into confulsions like at flander's park, all the better!
This reminds me of that one episode of the Simpsons where Ned builds Praise-Land in the memory of Modd.

I would probably not go to a religious theme park, mostly because I am not religious at all.


Top Three Parks: 1) Islands of Adventure 2) Bucsh Gardens Europe 3) Six Flags Magic Mountain

SLFAKE said:
Imagine the park food....

Loaves and Fishes cafe is having a special on Mana (with Honey dipping sauce).


Not necessarily...if there are any baptists is charge at the park there would be one incredible buffet...plus, plenty of gravy for everything!

Seriously though, even as someone who stands pretty straight forward about my faith...this is a really bad idea. If the "Holy Land Experience" hasn't been proof enough, remember the attempts back in the eighties with Jim Baker/700 Club building a theme park.

In all the years I did senior trips for my kids in our churches youth group...this never came up, and it never would've. We went to Cedar Point every single time.

"Sir, the last seat of the coaster requires two riders."

"Not a problem, Jesus is my ride partner and I'm planning on giving him one heck of a Mooshing." ;)

Seriously though, if I want religious theming I'll go with the mythical Greek gods of Mt. Olympus.

As the great prophet once sang, "I may be going to hell in a bucket, but at least I'm enjoying the ride."


Yeah is Good!
A new park 30 minutes away from me? I'm so there.

I survived a Japanese typhoon and the Togo flat ride of death!!!!!!
A carousel would be 2 of every animal.
One of those boat rides with the big drop at the end that soaks everyone on the bridge above called "Involuntary Baptism" (Catholic themed ride)
Something would have to be themed after the Lions Den.
Wouldn't anyone here like to eat at a Dinner called "The Last Supper" how inviting.

SLFAKE said:
Other ideas:

- security will all be dressed as Roman Centurions


...definitely going. And I'll do my best to get kicked out.

Do you think they'll have baptisms in the wave pool?


Ben Ryker

rollergator's avatar
OMG...it's BEN! Thought we'd lost you to a sasquatch or somethin'... ;)

Check your PMs.

I want to see the Highway To Hell turnpike cars with animatronic depictions of the Ten Commandments or a roman orgy....

AC/DC: I'm goin' dowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwn a highway to hell....


Great Lakes Brewery Patron...

-Mark

More ideas:

"Spanish Inquisition": Interactive / hands on play area for the kiddies.

Opening weekend special at the Mur Imporium: Indulgence for sale at 20% discount!

And guests are reminded to get their "Prodigal Son Handstamp" for re-entry into the park.


"Yes... well... VICTORY IS MINE!"
There should be a place themed "Tribulation House" you go in and get attacked by all of the plagues, four horsemen and the 7 headed serpent. At the end of the ride, if you repent, you get to go out through the gift shop and pick a free souvenier.

Oh, and a dive coaster called "Jonah's Whale".

At the end of the day, you must not look back at the park on the way to your car. Or else...you know...


Thanks for another great season, VF!

OhioStater's avatar
Every night at 9:45 pm before the park closes there's a crucifixion on the main stage.


millrace said:
What about a carousel where you can ride the Lamb of God?


Hopman said:
What about a "Two of Every Kind" zoo? That'd blow people away.

I'm going to combine these two ideas into...

Noah's Carousel!

It will be a huge custom 2-row machine where a male and female version of each species of animal march side-by-side in succession. It will be located right next to a modern-day incarnation of ther classic walkthrough attraction, Noah's Ark.

I beat you to that idea Rob :)
Oops... sorry Tony. Somehow I missed your post. But in my defense, I came up with the idea of combo-ing it with a Noah's Ark walkthrough ;)
rollergator's avatar
"Parting of the Red Sea" Shoot-the-Chutes?

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