Saw an article that reminded me of this thread. (Man, I think of you guys a lot!)
According to Mitch Hawker's internet condiment poll, mustard is the best condiment, though I don't think all the eaters have even tried ranch dressing so it's just a popularity contest.
Hobbes: "What's the point of attaching a number to everything you do?"
Calvin: "If your numbers go up, it means you're having more fun."
I love ketchup. LOVE! Sometimes when I squirt ketchup beside my fries, I jokeinly ask myself, "Do you want some fries with that ketchup?" But seriously, I don't know why I wanted it with my hot dog mentioned above. I kind of don't remember asking for it, unless it was for my fries. I normally eat my dog with mustard, sauce, and onions.
I'm with Vater about mayo. My dislike for mayo is almost a mental disorder. When I was a kid, I couldn't go down the condiment aisle at the grocery store because of the mayo. "What if it splashes in my eye or gets on my skin?" I would ask.
About five or so years ago, I ordered a mushroom and swiss burger at McDonald's for the first time. Every mushroom and swiss I ever had at other restaurants had just mushrooms and swiss cheese. I took one big bite, and noticed something unusual about the sandwich. I opened it up, and almost died when I saw, you guessed it, mayonnaise slathered all over my burger. SLATHERED!
I shrank into a wrinkled little raisin in the fetal position in the corner of the room and died. Just kidding. I walked to the counter and kindly asked for another sandwich, while joking about my mayo problem.
In hindsight, taking a bite of mayo didn't kill me like I thought it would. It actually helped me to not be so freaked out about it. I'm happy to have accidentally eaten a bite of mayonnaise is something I thought I would never say. I'll never do it again though.
-Travis
www.youtube.com/TSVisits
If I have to scrape mayo off a burger, it takes minutes because of my need to be thorough, the mayo-covered knife or napkins or whatever must immediately be discarded, along with the pieces of lettuce and whatever else was touching it, and the burger must then be doused in ketchup or barbecue sauce to drown out any remaining microscopic remnants of mayo that I couldn't scrape out of the tiny crevices of meat and bread.
Lake of fire? No, my hell is a sea of mayonnaise.
I love mayo...can't stand Miracle Whip though. I totally get the freaky mayo aversion though. That's how I am with olives. I hate them so much that I've been known to toss my cookies just smelling them. My sister from another mister makes awesome Spanish rice, but I didn't know her mom makes the same rice with olives, and I was off my food for the rest of the day.
"Look at us spinning out in the madness of a roller coaster" - Dave Matthews Band
I actually prefer my fries plain. Just good and salty. If I am going to put something on them, it's going to be heavy - like chilli and cheese. If it's a thicker, more natural fry then a malt vinegar is good.
I never knew so many people had such an adversion to Mayo (real or fake). Proving yet again that this room is made up of some weird-ass mofos. :)
Ketchup. I guess I'm old school in that I think of it as something kids generally like. I'm trying to think of situations where I use it and the only thing I can think of is burgers - always along with other condiments. Just ketchup on a burger would be...blech.
I do use it as a base for other things like making BBQ sauce or, like Gator mentioned, something like a MeatLoaf glaze/sauce.
At my house, BBQ sauce, ketchup, brown sugar, and bacon pieces come together to make the best meatloaf glaze ever. Ketchup is a requirement for hamburgers and hotdogs, but I love mayo on a burger.
Also at my house, 2 jars live in the refrigerator. Miracle Whip for my partner and Hellman's for me. We each of us find the other disgusting. (the mayo, not each other) (although sometimes...)
My friend Kathi gave me a jar of Duke's Mayonnaise and claims it's the best stuff ever. It's only available in Texas, or the south, I guess, so I'm saving it for a special occasion.
Mayonnaise for French fries is totally awesome. And it's sooooo European. But I could eat mayo right out of the jar. Which is why Travis and I can never date.
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