TR: MA 6/24 Never, ever, Again!

Associated parks:
None

Wednesday, June 26, 2002 8:47 PM

First, it was 99 degrees today at MA. Thankfully the park will serve you a cup of ice for 25 cents. World class.

But I digress, we arrived and I paid the $23 to enter the park. Upon entering I rode Big Dipper for some first-timers and then onto Zach's Whatsitcalled.

We then hit Be Bop Boulevard where would encounter our first problems of the day. The car ride has two tracked but one of them was CLOSED! Our group waited approximately seven minutes to ride. We would have been on the line quicker but a mommy and her little boy came up the exit and thought they were waiting in line. Since our group was large and we didn't want to be split up we were FORCED to let her line jump. Yep, that's right! There were NO employees at the exit of this ride to make sure nobody linejumps! The worst part was that these two who went first got a green car and green is MY FAVORITE COLOR!!! So thanks to them I got stuck in a pink car. The madness and pure terror doesn't end there though. When this ride was announced for the 2000 season, I was told the cars would play music. Two years later when the ride finally opened, my pink car did not have music!!! If this is what the $3 increase in admissions is for, someone owes me $3! My other friends' music worked fine and they had a great ride. Sure wish I could have. I thought about riding again but then quickly remembered the seven minute queue and the line jumpers and got frustrated.

After that, I headed over to Corkscrew. While walking on the midway, I noticed something unusual for a Cedar Far park. Lack of garbage cans. From the BBP exit to the Corkscrew entrance (about 50 feet) I only noticed seventeen garbage cans in the park!!! I have come to expect at least 35-40 garbage cans in a 50 foot radius. At this point I realized something very important, Michigan's Adventure simply does not care.

After my ride on Corkscrew our next stop was Dogems. I almost started crying at this ride. When I come to a park like MA I expect safety. However, upon arrival I noticed all the exit gates wide open while the ride was running!!! Furthermore once I finally got on the ride (I actually had to WAIT because other people got there before me!!!) I noticed all sorts of bad things happening. First of all, people were hitting each other, and hitting each other hard. Riders were purposely driving into others and laughing about it! At first I was nervous but then I was all-out terrified when someone hit me! I tried to motion to the ride operator but she did not notice my cries. After the initial bump, I was continually slammed and charged at by the other riders. I really hate to stereotype and It kills me to say it but most of the people hitting me where mothers, fathers, and little kids. Yep, I guess the bad crowds have found their way into MA. I have been coming here for two years now and each year I have noticed more of these mothers, fathers, and "children", most of whom were probably unsupervised, on drugs, and uncaring for others. Believe me, I have been inside schools where children are, and they have NO PLACE outside free to do what they want, even if it is summer.

We then rode Shivering Timbers. This ride can be great but was running in "meh" mode. I don't want to point any fingers but I'm pretty sure if there were more employees the ride would be running much, much faster, especially in the double up. Also on Timbers I rode the second row and the boy in front of me started bleeding! After the ride there were no employees to wipe his chin or apologize to me because he was bleeding. Obviously the park is going for a different type of market than they were last year. I'm not sure but I'm pretty sure last year they had signs that read "If you are bleeding you will be ejected from the park without a refund" and take my word for it since I only live two states away from the place. Geez...

After Timbers we headed over to the Flying Trapeze. We entered the line and since it was empty, proceeded to the front. At this point my mouth practically dropped to the floor! A chain that was supposed to be in place to stop riders from entering the ride area was not properly secured!!!! There was nothing preventing me from entering the ride area and getting hit by riders flying by at high speeds. Its a good thing I'm not a blind person! Thinking quick on my feet, I instantly and firmly gripped the railings on each side of me to prevent any blind people from wandering into the ride area. I tried contacting the ride operator, who was standing about six feet to the left but he gave me a look as if to say "don't make me tap the sign." You see, at each ride there are these lovely blue signs that say, "Do not disturb the ride operator." Maybe if the ride operators need disturbing the signs would give me a break and let me disturb them!!! Again there were no employees to help me and I was left alone to defend myself from the ride. It was a very scary moment that definitely made me think extra hard about the choices I have made in my life and what I would do if it all came crashing down... Eventually the ride ends (thankfully no one was hurt) and the ride operator lets people out of the exit. Once the ride was completely unloaded, I enter the ride area and take a seat. Minutes later, the ride operator approaches my friends and I with an upset look. Our conversation was as follows.

ride operator: You put the chain down did you?

me: No, you left it open during the entire ride.

ride operator: Oh well next time you wait it is no good to come into here without my letting

WHY AM I BEING PUNISHED FOR DOING SOMETHING THAT IS NOT MY FAULT!!! Also the ride operator did not speak English very well. I don't think that was the problem though, I think if the Flying Trapeze had three to four more employees working the ride the entire incident could have been avoided. Again this is why I will NEVER return to this park! It is dangerous!

We tried to shake off the danger by riding Falling Star. Wouldn't you know it, there was another incident! Despite the fact that the exit and entrance was secure, a little girl jumped over a fence and directly next to the ride while we were riding to grab her hat! I tried to tell the operator to "Please stop the ride there is a little girl who jumped over the fence directly next to the ride trying to grab her hat and if you stop the ride now you might not hurt anyone!!!" but by the time I could finish saying this our car had already spun around for three complete revolutions and the girl was found. Another close call at MA, too close. If there were security employees guarding the fences (or perhaps dog employees?) this would have never happened.

We decided it was time for a break from the danger. At this point we wandered towards the back of the park. Once again, there were hardly any garbage cans. There must have been well over 1,000 people in the park today and less than 3,000 garbage cans!!! How can they call this a Cedar Fair park!? It obviously isn't one. A Cedar Fair park would have garbage cans, safe rides, and not be 99 degrees!

We finally got to the water park and I saw the most absolutely unforgivable and intolerable scene out of any amusement park I have EVER visited (and I have been to Disneyland Paris!). People outside the water park were walking around in BATHING SUITS. And let me tell you, it was nasty. Absolutely vile images of hairy humans with overgrown bodies and disgusting features absolutely FLAUNTING themselves around the midway like this were some sort of beach. Again, by glancing at the faces it was easy to see who was causing the problems...mothers, fathers, and children. The worst part was that there were employees walking around not doing anything about it!!! There is NO EXCUSE for the boarder line nudity we saw this afternoon. I quickly covered my eyes and immediately dropped to the floor panicking. I lied there on the concrete for several minutes before finally running out of there as quickly as possible. Once again the wrong types of crowds have invaded this park and are running the place. I'm not sure if it is the Muskegon area or what but I was appalled to see guests of a park displaying such ignorance inside its gates as well as the employees standing there watching it.

At this point I was ready to leave but my friends wanted to ride Adventure Falls. I patiently waited almost ten minutes because the park was only running ONE of THREE boats for this attraction. What a dump. Afterwards they waited on "the bridge" to get splashed. Since no one was on the ride they would not send the boat. Finally it was sent empty and my friends barely got wet on the bridge. Then they all got kicked out! I do not understand why a person cannot get splashed more than once. If I was a friend of mine and I wanted to get splashed more than once I would be upset if I could not do so.

On our way out we rode the Sea Dragon. As we arrived we noticed two guests on the inside of the gate standing five feet from the moving car. "Do not disturb the operator."

Since this is a Cedar Fair park with Peanuts, I can say "good grief" and goodbye to this rotting carnival with bushes and dumb landscaping forever! Yeah, the trees, flowers, and bushes look great. But glossy new landscaping does not cover up the deep-routed and dangerous issues at this park. Had it not been for the fact that I am very wealthy, I would have been very upset about giving up 23 "hard-earned" dollars. I wanted a fun day away from my worries but instead I was thrown a bunch more. This park has really gown downhill from an amusement park to an ABUSEment park which I will no longer visit.

Awww juice...

*** This post was edited by Flabby Lips on 6/27/2002. ***

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Thursday, June 27, 2002 2:20 AM
Cute, real cute. You should try going to Timbersfest next year, it's really scary then.
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Thursday, June 27, 2002 3:14 AM
Not bad. Have you, Flabby Lips, ever read any George Saunders? Kinda reminds me a little of his stuff ...

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Age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill.

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Thursday, June 27, 2002 3:17 AM

Hey. I went one time in 2000 and don't care to go back. If I lived closer that approx. 7 hours then maybe I would have a different opinion.

I have a CP season pass and it would not cost anything for me to get in. To me the park had little to offer except for ST. I also didn't care to chuck out the $4 for the tubes in the waterpark.

If this is your home park, by all means go and have a great time. For me, I will pass and drive only 5 hours to HW.

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Thursday, June 27, 2002 3:55 AM
Thanks for the laugh Flabby Lips, very funny stuff.
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Thursday, June 27, 2002 4:33 AM

Flabby Lips said:

...Yeah, the trees, flowers, and bushes look great. But glossy new landscaping does not cover up the deep-routed and dangerous issues at this park.

If the "new" landscaping looks great, I hate to think what the park looked like before!

Whilst I was waiting for ST, some mother on the ride starting screaming at the ride ops that her daughters seatbelt came undone during the ride as the ops hadn't checked it properly. The Ride ops said or did nothing!


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Thursday, June 27, 2002 4:49 AM
Entertaining, to say the least :)
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Doesn't it seem as though morons always have the caps lock on?
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Thursday, June 27, 2002 5:22 AM

Flabby Lips said:

bad things happening. First of all, people were hitting each other, and hitting each other hard. Riders were purposely driving into others and laughing about it! At first I was nervous but then I was all-out terrified when someone hit me! I tried to motion to the ride operator but she did not notice my cries. After the initial bump, I was continually slammed and charged at by the other riders. I really hate to stereotype and It kills me to say it but most of the people hitting me where mothers, fathers, and little kids. *** This post was edited by Flabby Lips on 6/27/2002. ***



Ummm isn't this what one would normally do on the BUMPER CARS.

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Track Record: 110 and counting.....

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Thursday, June 27, 2002 5:40 AM
That's what I was thinking PatMan007. That's what your supposed to do on bumper cars, run into each other. I find it to be one of the best stress relieving rides ever put into a park. They should have them at all places of employment that way after a long day of work you can put all your co-workers on the ride and take out your frustrations! :) Wouldn't that be great?

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Proud member of the Frequent Flyer Club of CBuzzCon '02

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Thursday, June 27, 2002 5:56 AM
Shut up.

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Just call me MPG...

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Thursday, June 27, 2002 6:01 AM

Wait a minute....how can you be very wealthy without driving a car that costs more than $35,000? I'm sorry a NON-MINIVAN that costs more than $35000.

And how dare you judge the people of Muskegon! You are in no position to do so if you earn more than $12,000 a year. I guess you gotta work at a gas station or wait tables (where no one tips) to figure out who the gangbangers are.

-'Playa

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The CPlaya 100--6 days, 9 parks, 47 coasters, 2037 miles and a winner.....LoCoSuMo.

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Thursday, June 27, 2002 6:05 AM

I think that Flabby Lips is being ultr-sarcastic and making fun of me and my bad TR on SFGAm from Sunday.

Don't go off on him because of me. It's just a reaction to my TR. If you read my TR and then his, you will find that he has not-so-subtly pulled elements of mine into his and ripped them to shreds. Or tried to.

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Just call me MPG...

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Thursday, June 27, 2002 6:15 AM

Perhaps you couldn't tell, but SO WAS I.

SFGAM was Park #4 of the CPlaya 100 and I sure didn't leave the park feeling the way you did.

-'Playa

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The CPlaya 100--6 days, 9 parks, 47 coasters, 2037 miles and a winner.....LoCoSuMo.

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Thursday, June 27, 2002 6:21 AM
That pretty accurately sums up the day though. I'm surprised he left out the part when we confused the ride operators at Timbers by asking what time zone we were in.

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Ride the New England Bush!

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Thursday, June 27, 2002 6:21 AM

Isn't this supposed to be fun?

If someone's opinion of a park differs from yours, there's no reason for personal attacks.

Get a grip, and remeber what this hobby is about.

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"drop rides, not bombs."

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Thursday, June 27, 2002 6:26 AM

Hey 'Playa. I do NOT work at a gas station or wait tables!! I am a CHEF and unfortunately, we are NOT all high-paid TV stars like Emeril!!

ANYWAY, if you read both of the TRs (mine and his) you'd find some nuggests of goodness.

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Just call me MPG...

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Thursday, June 27, 2002 6:29 AM
See MPG? You have started a trend. :)

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""To be the man, WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!, You got to beat the man""!!!

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Thursday, June 27, 2002 6:31 AM
Maybe I have. Too bad people around here can't accept someone not automatically having a GREAT day and daring to tell them about it.

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Just call me MPG...

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Thursday, June 27, 2002 6:34 AM

MagnificentPaganGoddess said:

I am a CHEF and unfortunately, we are NOT all high-paid TV stars like Emeril!!



Do you work in Chicago? If so, where? Hope you don't mind me asking, but I have a bunch of friends in the restaraunt business in Chicago. Just curious.

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"drop rides, not bombs."

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Thursday, June 27, 2002 6:35 AM

chris said:

Get a grip, and remeber what this hobby is about.



Exactly... and what is it all about?

Padding your personal track record so you can say "I've ridden more coasters than you, so you don't know squat"... complaining because some coasters actually have lap bars that hold you in place and don't let you go flying off into thin air... complaining about any coaster that is not a record breaker or that is not the tallest or fastest... complaining about practically every coaster and labeling it "junk" if it is not 157.9% perfect... complaining about "GP" (i.e. anyone who you think does not completely agree with what you think... or does not memorized every stat on every coaster out there)... thinking the parks owe you something because you have labeled yourself an "enthusiast" or belong to a group of said "enthusiasts"... complaining about parks not running things properly (i.e. not running 3 trains when there are only 10 people in line)... knowing that park X is better than park Y because either a) park X belongs to a certain chain or b) Park Y doesn't have as many coasters... Thinking that the parks need to build a new coaster evey single year because they owe it to you...

Yeah... that is what is all about! Wouldn't want to be one of those peasants... those "GP"... who simply rides coasters because (GASP!) they are FUN!

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