VF 5/10 (BP)- My EXCLUSIVE ride on the 180-foot...
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Of course, this is written in the way-better-than-your-TR BulletPoint format--cuz who gives a rip every time I blew my nose at the park. Click on the link and get a copy yourself.
ARRIVED: 11ish, much earlier than I thought. I had some reasonably important things to do (like drop another $800 some-odd on more furniture) but wound up putting that off.
LEFT: Just a twitch before 4pm. IMHO VF has never been an all-day park, but they've been inching closer over the years. If you ask me, they're only a wavepool away. Wavepool......Gaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh..........
PARK APPEARANCE/ATMOSPHERE: Typical season opener with a new ride. Cough. Ooooooh. I feel like I'm catching something. I've got this scratch in my throat...my head feels hot....is that SARS? No! It's worse--it's the CTV (CoasterTool Virus)! Sweet Lord, somebody help me! I must have walked too close to that group of milling Enthusiasses--you know, the ones just staring at SV as if flashing their ACE cards would make it work or Larry Mackenzie had to crawl to them to apologize. It's taking overrrrrrr......
VF blew it! Their management has no idea how to operate a park! I predict their mass firings sometime next week. You'll see. There was actual DIRT with tread marks near the Enterprise and their two new stalls were inoperational. Worst of all, the park was festering with babbling idiots whose coaster knowledge is inferior to my own. Look at them--just wandering around with those silly grins and girlfriends and all. They shouldn't even be allowed to walk on their hind legs, much less speak in my presence. Hmmmpf.
Phew! Injected myself with antivirus just in time...I was this close to shopping for a denim vest. Like Blade, I have to keep my RCE infection in check. (Note to Jeff and CPG: Let's not start the 'other black people 'Playa resembles' bit again, huh?)
In the language of normal people....the new path from the Midway to SV is perhaps the most interactive in the park. WT drops reasonably close on one side, SV will whizz by on the other while SkyCoasterTower riders will scream overhead a little farther on. It's no CP Corkscrew path, but a nice touch.
The new wooden fencing in various areas (by first aid and the High roller restroom) was another nice touch.
RIDE QUEUE TIMES: Non-existent, no surprise for a cloudy day in the high 50s.
BEST EXPERIENCE: My Exclusive ride of course...on the half-off RipCord. I took a solo flight--that's exclusive, right? Right?
WORST EXPERIENCE: The weather. CBaby, Da Midget, my pal from work and her kids all bailed out far in advance.
MOST PLEASANT SURPRISE: The non-existent trims on High Roller's return run. While there's no mistaking it with CE, it's right up there with the best it's been. Let's hope this is SOP and not a lucky day.
Pleasant surprise #2 was watching hicks walk up to the new Coney Island stand and ask, "Duhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......can I gits me a Corn Dog?" Sorry, but no. "Waitaminnit, what's dat dare sign say? Duh won wid da letters and stuff?" See, that's why I can never manage a park--I'd sell corn as a topping and charge 'em extra. At least the new Gyro stand has big blue neon GYRO signs...like that's gonna help.
Surprise #3: Chaos operates in the reverse direction from prior seasons. I guess the heaviest rider should sit on the left now.
BIGGEST DISAPPOINTMENT: The 6" height increase for the Enterprise. Da Midget will be crushed. She's finally more than tall enough to ride the 'growed-up' stuff and this was her favorite of favorites during her 47 5/8" season. She will be devastated. Sure, she can board the more frightening Chaos or Looping Starship--but do they offer the security of Daddy's lap? Nope. This policy needs reworking. Parents don't need an amusement park to endanger their kids when every playground in America offers ten times the risk for free. Perhaps 48" with an 'adult' instead of a 'responsible person'? Just a thought.
RIDE RANKINGS
REALLY QUITE GOOD:
Excalibur - still the best pop of air in the park with WT in 'not-what-it-used-to-be, but-could-be-worse' mode. The only coaster I rode more than once. I can't bring myself to rate a coaster with the world's longest drop trim 'without flaw'.
PT Turbo Drop - It may be just a tad less intense, but fun nonetheless.
COLD FRIES BAD (annoying but not without strong points)
Wild Thing - I know, I know--but I'm not even complaining (much) about the MCBR. Train #1 is wickedly loud over the anti-rollbacks in the back. You can't even shout to each other over it. Other than that, I would have rated it higher.
PT Space Shot - What the heck? Where's the pop of air at the top? Of course, I could always go for a good bodyslam into the restraints. Nevertheless, the GP didn't seem to care. Personally, I'll always rate this ride against a lucky night in September of 2000--when it whupped IB's, IOA's and every Shot I've boarded thus far. I know what it can do.
I skipped the other coasters for later. I don't expect anything new there.
MAJOR NON-COASTER ACTIVITIES: Walking back to the car over and over--first to retrieve Da Ray Bans, then to drop off my RipCord video, then to toss in a couple bunnies I won. I got in to go home too--that makes four.
BEST NON-COASTER RIDE: Thunder Canyon--for the morons who rode in this weather and shivered back to their cars. Signs should have read "Your IQ must be this low to ride".
-'Playa
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The CPlaya 100--6 days, 9 parks, 47 coasters, 2037 miles and a winner.....LoCoSuMo.
*** This post was edited by CoastaPlaya 5/12/2003 11:49:55 AM ***
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Timberhawk opens in June! I'm gonna beat you to it... ;)
PARK APPEARANCE/ATMOSPHERE: Typical season opener with a new ride. Cough. Ooooooh. I feel like I'm catching something. I've got this scratch in my throat...my head feels hot....is that SARS? No! It's worse--it's the CTV (CoasterTool Virus)! Sweet Lord, somebody help me! I must have walked too close to that group of milling Enthusiasses--you know, the ones just staring at SV as if flashing their ACE cards would make it work or Larry Mackenzie had to crawl to them to apologize. It's taking overrrrrrr...... VF blew it! Their management has no idea how to operate a park! I predict their mass firings sometime next week. You'll see. There was actual DIRT with tread marks near the Enterprise and their two new stalls were inoperational. Worst of all, the park was festering with babbling idiots whose coaster knowledge is inferior to my own. Look at them--just wandering around with those silly grins and girlfriends and all. They shouldn't even be allowed to walk on their hind legs, much less speak in my presence. Hmmmpf.
This really erks me. I was part of that group, and the majority of us had attended media day, we were in NO way complaing about the park. In fact, we were talking to Dave (director of operations) about various things about the rides, other rides, and the park in general. Some of us were also talking to the ride's team lead, same type of converation there. I think you seem a bit jelious that you didn't get to ride, as, you resort to makeing us seem like slobbering jerks trying to get the park to suck up to us. It was exactly the opposit. Please, next time you feel like ripping on people, please know why you are ripping them.
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Cameron Willis
Waiting for Coaster Mania!
*** This post was edited by CoasterCameron 5/11/2003 9:27:42 PM ***
SFGAm has an Enterprise(Orbit) and you can be 42" to get on.
CoasterCameron. If you know 'Playa' like we know 'Playa', its all in good fun. If you take something like this so seriously, than you must have been apart of the guilty party he refers to.
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Arena football has arrived in the Windy City. Go "Chicago Rush"
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Cameron Willis
Waiting for Coaster Mania!
Hello, Captain Obvious here. Allow me to mediate between you and my very good friend CPlaya.
Hey wait a minute..what have we here? Let me analyze that first post with the infrared RayBans. Hmmm, lookee lookee...
- The immediate assumption people are 'jelious' of him
- Dropping names of park staff (like the normal people care)
- makeing the opposit of correctly spelled words in a truly erksome way
- Absolutely no denial of the lack of girlfriends
- Sense of humor, sense of humor...increasing magnification....nope can't find any
And what would ya say we have?
Geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeks! Run for the hills!
If Jeff can laugh at a suggestion somebody bomb his subdivision and mods can proudly wear silly nicknames I've slapped on 'em, you can handle a little yuk now and then. Try some Metamucil. It might help.
But then again, maybe you aren't ready to join the ranks of Oat Boy, The Human Asterisk (formerly Gator Boy), Sour Boy, Stalkee, UpsideDawnGrrl, Da BirdDog, Da Poodle, SquintMaster A, The Incredible Dex, YoYoBaybeeMan or anyone else actually honored by a little roast. Sorry, I forgot a few....Danny, can you remind me what I named you? Did I give Boblogone a name or just stick him in the JVs with that silly little bike? Anyway, see if you ever wind up in a 'Playa post again.
-CO
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The CPlaya 100--6 days, 9 parks, 47 coasters, 2037 miles and a winner.....LoCoSuMo.
*** This post was edited by CoastaPlaya 5/12/2003 1:47:56 AM ***
I guess it really hurts when it hits so darn close to home. I guess he can only see red, seeing as how he's erked. LOL!
Lighten up, dude. You may have read a few other of Playa's posts, but you obviously haven't been around for very long. Hell, my wife has been in Japan for 3 weeks, I haven't been "satisfied" in some time, and yet I don't misread his post even with all the hormones (I haven't expelled) taking over... Take the 2x4 out of your eye, my brother. :)
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Holy crapola! Sony might eat me alive!!! - if you don't get it, you haven't been following along.
*** This post was edited by nasai 5/12/2003 2:19:14 AM ***
I walked into the "Heroes" store after a G's inducing, pretzel looping, ride on Superman: Ultimate Flight.
I first step into the store and what do I see? Spiderman, Superman, Wonderwoman, Batman, etc., etc., items and apparel. But for the life of me, I could not locate any Captain Obvious goodies.
I calmly approached the store employee and asked where this great merchandise might be located. He just gave me a odd look!!! Can you believe that????
I couldnt even spot any Ray-Bans.
Oh, the humanity. I would have worn a CO shirt around the park with great, and I mean GREAT, pride! :)
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Arena football has arrived in the Windy City. Go "Chicago Rush"
Check out the new Steel Venom perma-sign plunked right in the middle of the pathway. It's across from the Mini Donuts, over by the entrance to Enterprise...
On both sides, underneath the SV logo, Valleyfair has that oh so inspiring slogan,
"Feel the The Strike"
Guess the coaster isn't the only thing in need of some repairs.
Skunky
I mean absence makes the heart grow fonder but come on....
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God bless Intamin, Company that I love. Stand beside her, and ride her, from the opening to the closing of the day.
BTW, I think I just saw a certain poster on a milk carton. The description said, "Last seen milling around Steel Venom..."
-CO
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The CPlaya 100--6 days, 9 parks, 47 coasters, 2037 miles and a winner.....LoCoSuMo.
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Holy crapola! Sony might be the ultimate destination!
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God bless Intamin, Company that I love. Stand beside her, and ride her, from the opening to the closing of the day.
It's great to hear from you (in all your 'chasm'atic glory!) again, especially in the BulletProof TR format. Steel Venom is one of the random rides I'm very excited about this year (including Swamp Thing at Wild Adventures and Sledge Hammer at PCW) as I think it could greatly improve the park in many departments from what I've heard.
You and your wavepools though... One of your absolute favorites opens at PKI soon, lol! ;)
-Danny
Exactly why are you excited about a rough Vekoma Junior Coaster? :-p
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Top Thrill Dragster -- The most intense, unbelievable, and spectacular fifteen seconds on any coaster, anywhere, ever.
As for your sig Joe, I can tell you've never been on Tiger Terror... LOL!
-Danny <-- amateur (and loves Vekomas)
*** This post was edited by Koaster King 5/13/2003 9:03:12 PM ***
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Jeff - Webmaster/Admin - CoasterBuzz.com - Sillynonsense.com
"Pray that your country undergoes recovery!" - KMFDM
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