VF - 8/31: Children of the Corn

Associated parks:

I know, I know. What the hell does corn have to do riding coasters? It just so happened that Valleyfair! was having a weekend long corn cook-out, so everywhere we went were people walking around carrying it, eating it, littering with it (unfortunately), and even wearing it (slobs!). To top it off, my wife decided to buy some corn-on-the-cob for our evening's dinner, so I just couldn't escape the stuff!

Anyways, on to the trip report......

I'd been looking forward to this trip all summer, as I've been stuck on #99 for my track record since early June. Knowing that my #100 would take place here, I had to make a choice. As I've already been on three different impulses, it was rather easy. So, we wait for the gates to open, and it's off to be first in line for....

Wild Thing
Highs: Nice air on the second hill and a very unique turn-around.
Lows: Waaayyyyy too much MCBR trim, and strangely large trains.
The Verdict: My first Morgan becomes my #100

The thing that struck me most about this ride were the scale of the trains. Back in May, I was on the Twisted Twins at SFKK and felt that those trains were too small, like in 7/8ths scale. By comparison, I would say that Wild Thing's cars were too big, like 1-1/8ths scale. Now mind you, I'm not a small guy (6'3", 225lbs.), but I felt like I was sitting down in a NBA player's bathtub on these things.

RIDE ADVICE: Stay towards the front on this one. The MCBR trim totally kills any air in the back.

After two laps, it was a quick drop on Power Tower. Man, I love these things! I thought the little suspension bridge over to the queue was a nice touch. Then, considering capacity and the people still streaming in the gate, it was back up front to hit....

Steel Venom
Highs: Fun launch, and the first impulse I've seen where spectators can line up next to the full launch track, here.
Lows: My second experience with holding brake chatter.
The Verdict: The usual, thrilling Impulse, but with more differing colors than an Andy Warhol print.

Alright, who got wacky with the paintbrush on this thing? It has four contrasting colors on the train alone, combined with a red station house roof. Looks like when my three-year-old starts messing with the colors on my RCT games.

After our launch fix, it was over to the other side of the park for a bit o' wood. But upon seeing two maintenance guys standing on the track, we kept walking to...

Mad Mouse
Highs: Tight layout, is that supposed to be trick-track?, and a strange color scheme that works.
Lows: Said trick-track not taken at enough speed to do anything.
The Verdict: A fun, little toy that has a bit more intensity than it looks like.

As small as the cars looked on this one, they suprisingly had ample legroom. We continued on back in the park, where we came upon an conundrum. Sitting before us was a nice, inverting swinging ship ride. The ship had all the sailing ship trappings you'd expect, from the bow sprint, tall center mast, all the way back to the ornate fantail. But, here's the kicker. What was this ride named? The Looping Starship.
Uhhh, guys, the only antique-style sailing vessel I've ever seen in the stars was in Tresasure Planet, and I know that came out way later than you did this ride. Wazzup with that?

Past our theming oddity, we continued past the unfortunately closed free waterpark, and back to....

Highs: Any ride that shares it's basic components with my beloved Gemini has to be okay.
Lows: Rougher than a steel-tracked ride has any right to be.
The Verdict: I never hype myself up for any ride, but this was a true case of aniticipointment.

Now mind you, this ride wasn't "cold fries bad" (CoastaPlaya term), but it definitely falls under "a useful addition to the park (Richard Bannister term). So we head back toward the front, where maintenance is now done on.....

High Roller
Highs: Nice old school coaster feel, trains I've never seen before
Lows: Definitely in need of some TLC
The Verdict: An unfortunate case of "it looks better than it rides"

Speaking of the trains, anyone know what these are? I've never seen such a Frankenstein set-up, with rubber bungee cords and screen-door pistons actuating the one-piece lap bars. Afterwards, it was across the midway for our last credit....

Highs: Nicely placed elements over the water, and cool ivy growing up around the station columns.
Lows: Did Toomer design these friggin' trains for Oompa-Loompas?
The Verdict: A nice old Arrow that must've been "the poopy" back in it's day.

Upon exiting the 'screw, we had all six coasters in just after 12 noon, so it was out to the lot for a picnic lunch. We were parked right under Wild Thing's turnaround, and right near Steel Venom, so we got food, and a show! After lunch, we popped back in for a couple more laps, and were out of the park by 2:30.

Overall, Valleyfair! struck me as a nice, little park. While not the place for an all-day adrenaline fix, I could definitely see coming back here with the brood when the young-uns are a little older. If I had to make one change, I would add a nice B&M floorless (like a B:TDK clone) back in the woods near Excalibur.

Unfortunately, my visit was not successful in all of its goals, as I was unable to make a sighting of Captain Obvious. Oh well, there's always next year!

"Everybody has desperate days of quiet questioning.
Everybody has times when they feel like they don't fit in."
- Color Theory, So Many Ways, 2001

You know, you talk lots of smack for a guy without cojones. Couldn't you have just jeopardized your marriage and made Big Chief's Cyclops your 100th coaster like I told you to? A week on the couch is a week on the couch, but a weak 100th coaster is forever.

Let me show you how badly you cheated yourself. When infamous 'one-click' coaster thugs clutch the restraints, you've got some serious air. Coulda been you, Eric. Coulda been you...


(who didn't get to the park 'till 3)

The CPlaya 100--6 days, 9 parks, 47 coasters, 2037 miles and a winner.....LoCoSuMo.

*** This post was edited by CoastaPlaya 9/4/2003 5:12:03 PM ***

Kick The Sky's avatar
Did you happen to sight me? I was there that day wearing a blue "X" shirt. It was my first visit to the park as well. My trip report can be found here.

You definately came to the same conclusion I did on Excalibur. I was expecting so much from it because it had the same type of track as Gemini but I found it to be truly painful and quite unenjoyable. Almost as bad as my ride on Psyclone a few weeks ago (well, ok, not almost, nothing can be as bad as Psyclone.)

Glad to hear you finally ticked off number 100. Wild Thing was a good choice, even though I felt the anticipointment bug on that one too. Did you go and get the credit over at the Mall of America too?

Being that your from Wisconsin, you probably had the same motivation to go on a road trip that I did, that being the Harley 100th anniversary party going on in Milwaukee.

Bob Hansen
Resident Airtime Whore

Dood - You live in Wisconsin and *still* haven't experienced the best half of a coaster known to man?

What are you waiting for?

Kick The Sky's avatar
You havent riden the three CCI's in the Dells? What is wrong with you man? Get to it. I expect a trip report on those three wonderful coasters by next week!!! ;)

Bob Hansen
Resident Airtime Whore

rollergator's avatar
chris, he's waiting for you and TTM to take me next year....on top of that *a-maize-ing* final CF park, I need to get to that park with three (THREE?) CCI masterpieces....

edit: Wi Dells certainly knew how to take advantage of a good thing while the advantage-taking was still ripe...;)

...as far as best half of a coaster known to man, it's gonna take *miracles* to knock Tremors' first hlaf out of the top spot...:)

bill, *swears* that Satan himself designs trains for Morgan....
*** This post was edited by rollergator 9/4/2003 2:40:16 PM ***

your comment of "jeopardizing" is a lot closer than I care to admit. Thus, I had to be a really good boy this weekend.

I thought you looked vaugely familiar. You were about 15-20 people in front of us on High Roller. If you're familiar with British cars, I had on a black T-shirt with the Lotus logo on it.

Given the success of the weekend, I'm working on the Dells really hard, like potentially this coming weekend.

Let me know when your cheese pilgrimage is. I've got a spare place to crash (right on I-90) if you need it.

"Everybody has desperate days of quiet questioning.
Everybody has times when they feel like they don't fit in."
- Color Theory, So Many Ways, 2001

nasai's avatar
EV, I live on I-90 too! Just 1800 miles away from you... ;) Fun TR. I wish I could go to the Dells. Oh yeah... you haven't been either! What the heck are you waiting for?
Rob - Jerk/Loser - Standing up for the unfunny and unattractive. - Click here for details
Hey I saw you Kick The Sky, I think you might have been right in front of my fiance and I on a couple of rides, and I was telling her about your shirt. We chowed down on the corn on the cob, yum yum. Well I haven't made as many coasters as all of you but I did make Wild Thing # 25 and Steel Venom # 30. I know that is lame but I have only been to 4 parks but I am planning trips now as we speak to other parks (Schlitterbahn & SFFT in 2005).

Skol Vikings

rollergator's avatar

nasai said:
EV, I live on I-90 too! Just 1800 miles away from you... ;)

From what I understand Rob, that's about a 2-hour commute for you...;)

EV, I'm gonna try to "cheese it" in the Late Spring, before schools send the kiddos home on parole...;)

Harley Davisdon special event in Millwaukee that weekend huh, so THAT would explain the large crowd at the Harley gift shop in the Millwaukee airport.

BTW: Dare I mention the coincidence that I was also at Valleyfair on August 31?????

(Trip Report to follow)

David Bowers
Mayor, Coasterville

I thought the exact same thing about the Starship, Since I was about 4yrs old I always thought it was called, the pirate ship, then earlier this year, I realized it was the Looping Starship...what a horrible name for a PIRATE ship. Nice TR though!

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