Dragster Replacement?

Tuesday, August 5, 2003 6:45 PM
Hi guys I just got back from a six day excursion to Cedar Pines. Before we left, I had to stop in the bathroom and that's when I heard some very interesting information. As luck would have it, Monty Jasper and Daniel Keller were "conducting business" in the stall next to mine. Not one to eavesdrop, I intently listened to their entire conversation. You guys are not going to believe this, but they were discussing plans for a top-secret ride that is set to replace Dragster for Summer 2004.

As you all know, Drasgster breaks down at least six times a day. Because of this, Cedar Pines is hemmoraging cash faster than Bill Gates in the software section of Circuit City. Because it's going to cost billions to fix Dragster, it appears that Cedar Pines is going to demolish the ride and replace it with the world's first ionosphere coaster. While the details for the new ride are sketchy, I can tell that it's going to be one hell of an experience.

To start with, this beast is going to rise thousands of feet into the Earth's ionosphere. Because the ride is so tall, it is going to be attatched to several satellites orbiting the equator. Unlike the current Dragster which is launched by an elevator cable, the new ride is going to feature it's own nuclear reactor. At the front of each train, ride operators will be able to easily replenish the reactors with a fresh bar of weapons-grade plutonium. Altough this may make the new ride a target for terrorists, it's a chance Cedar Pines is willing to take.

Code-named "The Black Pearl," this new attraction is going to cost at least $7.50 to ride. Riders must be 21 years of age or older and not have any medical conditions. The ride launches at 470MPH, travels a distance of 50 miles, and lasts for 2 minutes.

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Tuesday, August 5, 2003 6:48 PM
http://www.coasterbuzz.com/forum.aspx?mode=thread&TopicID=33375

That's the smoking thread.

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Mike Anderson

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Tuesday, August 5, 2003 6:49 PM
WTF?

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Don't Forget To Bring A Towel!

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Tuesday, August 5, 2003 6:49 PM
Shut up. Billions of dollars to fix dragster. No. maybe 1 million. In to the ionosphere. No. 21 or older. Your full of crap. If this breaks down we'll have a nuclear explosion on our hands. This isnt even funny
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There are 3 types of people in this world, people who can count, and people who can't.
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Tuesday, August 5, 2003 6:51 PM
Closing in 3,2...
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Tuesday, August 5, 2003 6:52 PM
I eat breakfast 300 yards from 4,000 cubans who are trained to kill me so don't think for one second that you can come down here, flash your badge and make me nervous.
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Tuesday, August 5, 2003 6:53 PM
WTF...I mean, really, WTF?

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This is the race that straps you into the driver's seat and counts down to GO!

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Tuesday, August 5, 2003 6:54 PM
How did you know it was them, were you peeking in?

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http://said.uc.edu/students/oakleysd/cp/CP.jpg
Now tell me Cedar Point is running out of space.

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Tuesday, August 5, 2003 6:54 PM
Good lord. Just when you thought it couldnt get any more wierd.

Closing.

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Arena football has arrived in the Windy City. Go "Chicago Rush"

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Closed topic.

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